"I don't believe an accident of birth makes people sisters or brothers. It makes them siblings, gives them mutuality of parentage. Sisterhood and brotherhood is a condition people have to work at." - Maya Angelou
I think of myself as very fortunate to have come to this realization as early as I did, and still often wish it had been earlier. For those who don't know him well, my brother is pretty amazing. His thirst for knowledge and his passion for the structure of words far surpasses anyone else in our family, when it comes to that form of intelligence. And his ability to will himself into quiet observation when it comes to conflict used to be a thing of envy to me. I cannot remember the exact moment that he became an individual of his own inspiration and not just an "accident" of a shared birth, but I often reflect on the division between those two ways of relating in our lives and only hope that the journey to come makes up for time taken for granted.
So when there was little hesitation to agree to join me on my drive back West after summer break, I was beyond honored.
On August 20th, with little pretense for either of us really to discuss, Jordan and I launched into our first trip together - siblings unite - across the country. Both of us seem to have a similar process when it comes to registering experiences on a tangible level. While my mother likes to pre-brief, de-brief and gnaw at every moment not yet unfolded, the two of us don’t really have a method of connecting to experiences that haven’t happened - that aren't present - in any way we find useful; we just go with it.
Of course, I was not going to deny myself completely of what I found important. I still wondered: could I access some level of emotional vulnerability that was never allowed stage time in our fragmented passings at home? Would I have the guts to “stay” in uncomfortable questions? to find a balance with them that allowed him to feel comfortable?
No, by cultivating an awareness to our different approaches, I was able to allow myself moments of just observing, listening and feeling what he was going through. Some situations in the past have called for push and shove, getting him out to go do something despite his adversity. But his being thrust into this trip was push enough and I simply wanted to navigate each day in a way he could feel most comfortable and at ease with. I’ve had this trip with it’s wanderlust approach. I’ve had my opportunities to bask in the mountain’s cradling and let inspiration be blown onto pages from wind that wisps my hair in time with river currents as I sit off highway roads and take my time. This was a different trip and it wasn't a bad one. We had some invaluable bonding time and I wouldn't have traded it for anything (I can't speak for him of course). Those are ours to keep and so I leave that space blank here.
Besides boldly taking to the wheel a couple of times (first time handling winding mountain highway!) one of Jordan's biggest contributions was our in-car entertainment. Main features included Justin Vernon and his many brain children i.e various projects, a british radio series called Cabin Pressure, a quirky dark comedy radio show called Night Vale and radio episodes of Cracked, which I never knew was a thing. And of course there was plenty of new music to be introduced to.
Day 1
Landed us in Ames, IA where my amazing friend Matt hosted us for the night. It was a far different experience from my first time visiting his home state, back when he lived in Fort Dodge. In contrast to the run down, disparate atmosphere of Fort Dodge, Ames seemed to be kicking' with fun local haunts, music and a vibrant, young community. Matt excitedly talked about the spurt of locally sourced, small businessy eateries and bars that had popped up in recent years, one of which - a fun food cart - he'd recently started working at where he gets to dress up however he wants (the majority of the clientele being drunk college kids who probably won't even remember what he's wearing). Jordan and I had a pseudo-picnic made up of leftovers and co-op fare while waiting for him to get off of work and visited with him back at the house before Jordan settled in for some down time and Matt and I took off to meet his friend Emily for some drinks. The next morning, he took me to his favorite coffee spot, a small basement venue called Vinyl Coffee where they collected and sold old records and sold a unique offering of home-baked goods, brought in from the owner's home kitchen each morning. 
That was the beginning to...
Day 2
Which quickly turned grey and wet. Jordan began the drive which I immediately felt bad about as we entered the highway with wipers waving as fast as they could go, rain beating down so hard it was pointless to try and listen to any entertainment over the din. Aiming to camp somewhere near the Badlands that night, we drove and drove and drove some more. Needing a stretch break anyhow, I encouraged a stop to the locale of the Corn Palace which sparked very little enthusiasm. Admittedly, I didn't have it in me to stay around long once we'd gotten out of the car either. The temperature had risen far above 90 and the streets were un-navigable due to a carnival which would have been fun except that the rides and such were not running so early in the day; probably more of an evening event. We came, we saw, we conquered. We got outta there. Jordan got us through the las painful stretch of driving while I tried to find campgrounds that we could reach before sundown. We opted on a small KOA about an hour out of the Badlands. I hadn't camped at a KOA in forever and it was certainly a more pampered experience than I'd expected. The grounds had a pool, a laundry room, very "trimmed" sites, a restaurant of sorts, and a game room equipped with a pool table. We set up camp, cooked some dinner and ended the night with a couple games of pool.
The weather was so mild that I'd been tempted to leave off our covers but just before bed, we looked up the weather and there was the chance of a storm. It was a good choice to cover up because, about 11pm, the downpour hit pretty full force. By morning, things had settled but the sky remained pretty overcast for...
Day 3
as we drove through the Badlands. We didn't really stop, since our agreed-upon destination had been Wind Caves. We drove mostly in silence, taking in the overpowering vastness of it all. We reached wind caves by mid-afternoon and snagged tickets for a 3pm 'Fairgrounds' tour - the same one Mother and I had done on our visit. I have yet to be disappointed by a national park guide. Our particular guide was a retired navy officer who, well over 60, had just finished school in environmental studies of some sort and had participated in lectures associated with...NASA? when I asked how he'd landed in this gig, he said it was the first place that had called him. He'd only been there since May. I had been under the impression that one had to have a particular focus to land a gig as a park guide but apparently not. Their training of the ecology must be pretty in depth though, because he knew his stuff. I enjoyed his analogy of the cave, offering up a mental image of a bowl of Ramen noodles to describe the tunnel system of Windcave - the most complex cave system in the world, squeezed into one square mile. Jordan quickly came to the realization that his feelings about being confined under hundreds of feet of earth in the dark damp cold had changed since he was last in a cave as a kid and I think was pretty relieved when we finally emerged. We called it an early evening at camp and took some time to ourselves to read in our tent. The weather wasn't terrible but it was windy enough to just want to huddle up in tents. When I finally came out to get ready for bed, he was already asleep. 
Day 4
We awoke to wet tents once again, having received an equally strong storm once again. I've been thoroughly impressed with the tent I have, as it's been the first one to not leak at all when faced with water. We were able to pack up the tents pretty immediately and after wiping off the covers with towels and shaking them out, we put them in bags to transport to our next destination. We were bound for Bozeman where a friend that I stayed with when she lived there a couple years ago had connected us with one of her gracious friends to post us up for the night. After two nights of stormy camping, I think we were both a bit relieved for some shelter. Recalling my breathtaking introduction to "Big Sky Country", I was pretty bummed that Montana was undergoing a state-wide gray day and Jordan couldn't be privy to the incredible display of rolling clouds and mountain horizons that had immediately won me over when I first drove through.
Margaret warmly welcomed us with hugs and urged us to make ourselves at home and then we headed out to the co-op - the best solution for different taste pallets - where I treated her to dinner. Originally from Ann Arbor, Margaret had met my other Ann Arbor friend only after moving out that way. I swear that the entire state of MI will have eventually evacuated to the west; I run into Michiganders all the time out here. We had pleasant conversation and came back home where we each seemed to be inclined to have our own space so there wasn't too much pressure to make ourselves social.
Day 5
Margaret felt bad that she didn't have a lot of breakfast options for me but I was just grateful for a real bed to sleep in. I had been interested in checking out a breakfast nook in town anyhow and finally having a real meal. We were up early and after saying our farewells, we rushed down to The Nova Cafe since she warned us that they tend to get crazy-packed for breakfast. We arrived just in time because by the time our food came, the lobby was packed and almost out the door. The last time I'd been there, Nova had been a simple coffee shop. Our table was placed where I remembered their counters for the coffee used to be and they'd completely renovated and expanded into the next building over. It was amazing what they'd done to the place. The lighting was bright and warm compared to the darkened atmosphere from before and their menu was brilliantly creative. I was happy to see Jordan actually enjoying the menu, torn between several options. The food was filling a sustained us for our full day of driving. 
Which was good, because we didn't really have much more relaxed down time. Up to Bozeman, we knew we'd have places to stay. But this day, we weren't really sure how far we could make it or what connections we could find. I let Jordan take the wheel while I made shootouts for both Spokane and Kennewick connections. I found an acquaintance willing to host us in Spokane, but emphasized to Jordan that it would be a crowded living situation with people I didn't know that well. When we reached Spokane, I ran into their co-op and asked him to sit quietly with the options of staying with people in Kennewick or splurging on a hotel where we were at and just ending our driving for the day. He opted for the hotel. I was glad I'd let him take control of the decision and quickly eased into the idea of having a full afternoon to relax. A day to unwind was much-needed. The hotel that we found was an unassuming option and if we'd just done a drive-by, I doubt we would have ended up there. The Ruby Hotel and Lounge was located in a vibrant red mod building with artwork of scantily clad female figures and bright neon light donning the street-side bar. The lobby was a small nook right outside of the lounge and the rooms were tucked back in a run-down looking parking lot. However, the experience was probably one of the best hotel experiences I've had. The staff were professional, hospitable and we were charged a decent price (which Jordan treated) for a full double-bed room with fridge and all the amenities etc. It was in walking distance from the main downtown mall and a restaurant I'd found for dinner so we went to go see an afternoon showing of Calvary at the mall. Navigating that place was a source of mild humor for the both of us and the movie was an agreed-upon win. We walked from there to the Saranac Public House. On the way, we discussed the meaning behind the movie and the film quality and then enjoyed another successful meal for the both of us - rich mac and cheese and a burger for him and ginger rice stir fry for me. We had an animated conversation about language and he seemed to loosen up into taking in the surroundings, getting curious about an old building across the street from us (which we finally concluded said Longbotham a friendly debate between three possibilities). He seemed in good cheer on the way back and we made little remarks about the city’s design (like the unfunctional Postal recepticals and the phone-scan maps on the sidewalk). And then back at the room, I took a shower while he fell into his own space with the computer, I to follow. Then we quietly got ready for bed and called it a night.
Day 6
I was up early and went out to hunt down real coffee, where I also found a rich-looking Cinnamon roll that looked too good not to get for Jordan. I sat in the breakfast area at the hotel - simply the bar whose counter had been converted to present a line-up of breakfast options - and waited for Jordan to emerge. We were on the road Portland-bound that day where we'd meet up with Tony for one last road night before meeting my dad in Seattle the next day. We were supposed to meet Tony at a place for dinner but Mondays proved to be the off-day for many businesses and we had to adjust a few times before settling on the Hedge House with simple deli fare. He and Tony seemed to hit it off, Tony's positive attitude always being magically infectious. We walked a bit to digest after dinner and then headed over to Salt and Straw which has apparently become my must Portland experience, especially since they now have the crazy amazing coconut ice cream decadency on the regular. Back at Tony's we meandered out to the river where Jordan pulled out his camera and experimented with night light play, getting some pretty neat shots. 
Day 7
Tony had to be up for work early and so we'd said our good byes the night before. Our last stretch of road to Seattle was our shortest driving day but I think I was just at my road weary limit because it was painful to get through. I was feeling pretty tightly wound up in stress when we arrived and I couldn't get a hold of Dusty and so we had to find a way to bide our time. Jordan couldn't really contribute excitement towards any ideas I threw out so we finally just headed to Pike's place where I think he at least got a kick out of some of the buskers. Around 3pm, we got a hold of Dusty and we spent a few hours on the waterfront catching up before heading to Capitol Hill for a fancy dinner. Dusty was excited to learn they served Poutine there which he had recently been told to try. Unfortunately, it was not all it was cracked up to be...
After dinner, he walked us down to the new Library, gushing the whole way about its amazingness. I was completely along for the ride but had no idea the scope of which this library covered the territory of AMAZING. architecturally, it was like nothing I'd ever been in before. The building itself slanted like a crouching being with crazy criss-cross glass panels. Each of the 7 or so floors was a different design, from the bottom with wood-etched phrases in the floor, to the dewy decimal book spiral to the red floor (literally a floor of RED) and finally to the top where you could look down (hight fearers be damned) to the mixed media floor with a forest themed patterning. All of this was connected by a series of blindingly bright chartreuse escalators. We picked up a newspaper on the way out which lay out the inspiring story of the artist and described in detail the innovations in the design specifics which heightened the efficiency and sustainability of the facility as a hub of knowledge for the modern being. Definitely worth the stop.
That night, we met up with my dad at a hotel in Federal Way and prepared to enter into our respective next chapters. A new year of school for him, and a new year of AmeriCorps for myself.
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